A Crappy Girlfriend? Sigh...

I am not going to lie...I am usually a fairly crappy girlfriend. I love my boyfriend more then I can tell you (or him), and I love that he loves me. I treasure our relationship, and pray that if this is God's will, I will have him forever and we will have our happily ever after.

Buuuuttt...I suck at loving him. I know how he feels the most loved, and I know the things he enjoys and what makes him happy. But, I seem to never ever do any of them, or let him do what he enjoys. Thank heavens he loves me despite all that!

I decided to make a list, mostly for myself, of ten ways I can better love my boyfriend. Keep in mind, these are ways to love him and keep our relationship pure, holy and Christ-centred. Maybe they'll help you too.

1. Pray for him and with him. Often and Always.
This will keep both of us centred on the most important things in life, and we will find a love that is extraordinary when we start doing this.

2. Let him be affectionate.
I do not receive or give love through physical touch of any kind. Hand holding, snuggling, etc. usually drives me crazy. I mean, sometimes I am okay with it, and other times I can tolerate it, but a lot of times it makes me cringe. But, I recognize that that is how he feels loved and shows me he loves me, so sometimes I need to be a bit affectionate and allow him to be affectionate towards me.

3. Make him food.
They say the way to a man's heart is through his stomach. They are not lying. It's true. I love baking and cooking, but I rarely make the time to make him a meal or bake for him. I know he loves when I do, so I need to try to make this a priority.

4. Treasure and value him. Hang onto his every word.
I know that he likes when I take the time to sit there and actually listen to what he says. Sometimes, when he is talking about work (he's an electrician) or other guy type things I totally zone out. I find it hard to listen intently when I don't fully understand what he is talking about.
I have realized though, that is doesn't matter if I understand what he's talking about or not. I just need to sit there and listen to him and ask questions. He is taking the time to tell me, so it is important to him and I need to respect that.

5. Do what he enjoys and don't complain.
There are things that my boyfriend enjoys that I have had a really difficult time warming up to. He loves to hunt. I was (and still kind of am) terrified of guns. It is mostly about the loud noise they make. It has taken me a very long time to take even the slightest interest in hunting. But, you know what, I actually kind of enjoy it now. It has been the same with fishing. But I know he loves that I can enjoy these things and that he knows he has a companion in me. That has made it worth every second.

6. Let things go.
I can be very grouchy. Thank heavens he's a patient man! I have a tendency to bring up old issues when I get grouchy. This is sooooo bad! I need to let things go and accept that he is not perfect (but he's darn close). He is allowed to mess up and hurt my feelings by accident once in awhile, and I need to learn to take care of the situation as it happens and forgive and move on.

7. Stop comparing him.
I am a sucker for Romantic Comedies. I love me a good, sappy love story. But, I have to limit myself because the men in those stories are not real and I cannot be comparing my relationship to those. That is so unfair!

8. Ask and value his opinion. About everything.
This is something I think I am getting better at. I need to let him know that I trust our relationship is in his hands and that I trust him to make good decisions for us. I am not saying I cannot have a mind of my own, but he deserves to be asked when there is a decision to be made. Not only that, but his opinion deserves serious consideration. Don't just ask for the sake of asking.

9. Surprise him.
He has told me that he loves when I surprise him. Not with big things or a party, but just if I stop by unexpectedly. I need to remember that he is important, and I can make time in my schedule to stop by his work with breakfast or just for the sake of saying hello.

10. Really date him.
I need to date my boyfriend. He is not to be taken for granted, and I need to remember that. I need to always be fully present when I am with him, and really, really date him!

I hope these maybe help you in your relationships! And, let's all pray that we can treasure the relationships in our lives!

Many blessings,

Emily xo