High school wasn't all that long ago for me, and I don't think high school boys have changed that much. So I know what it's like, and I decided to write a letter to all the boys that will date my little sisters. Here goes...
Dear boys who will date my little sisters,
I am sure you're a nice boy. I am sure you have good, pure intentions (or at least you better). And, I am giving you the benefit of the doubt. But, that doesn't mean I won't give you a hard time. Don't take it personally, I am just being a big sister.
I know my sister in a way you will never have the privilege of knowing her. I have a bond with her that you will never separate, and at the end of the I will be here for her when you can't. When you hurt her feelings, or when she's angry with you, she will come to me, and if you break her heart, I will be here cleaning up the mess you walk away from. When she's trying up with a birthday gift to knock your socks off, I will be the one she calls. And when you first reach for her hand, I will be the one she tells.
No matter how old you are when you meet her, I knew her and loved her first. And, she will always be my baby sister. I fought with her first, hurt her feelings first, told her I loved her first, held her hand first. Before you knew how she felt about you, I knew. Before she first smiled at you, she smiled at me. And, before she met you, I held her when she cried. I told her stories late at night to make her smile and get her to sleep. I read her Franklin a hundred time. And before she is your girlfriend, she is my sister, and I will always protect her heart.
If she loves you, I love you. If she spends every second of every day talking about you, I talk about you too. I may never tell you, but you are important to me because you make her smile in a way I never can. She loves you in a love that makes her insides have butterflies and makes her heart happy. And I would never, ever wish that love away.
So, treat her like the princess she is. When she's angry, thank God for her passionate spirit. It's a family trait you'll never weed out of her. When she cries, hold her, wipe away the tears, and tell her you love her. When she's stressed out, bring her chocolate, and pray with her. When she tells you secrets, hold them close to your heart, and recognize the honour it is to know her heart that way, because not many do.
Pray with her and for her. She deserves a prince, and if you can rise to the occasion, pray for your own heart also. Pray for the strength to love her purely and innocently. Pray for guidance and discernment in your relationship. And, pray God will make you a man worthy of her heart.
I know that if you're dating her you already know how wonderful she is. How beautiful, how stunning, how faithful, how passionate, how caring and how sweet. As time passes you will learn her every fault, and every good point. Each day you will discover more and more about her. That is a blessing. Love everything good about her, but don't love her because of the good things. Love her because she is human, and because she messes up. And love her through absolutely everything.
If you have the honour of holding her heart, for this moment, for a season or for a lifetime, remember the gift God has given you, and treasure it. Remember to care for it and to always call it to growth, and to be better and better with each passing day. Challenge her. And never forget how you won her heart, because when all else fails, go back to that moment and remind her why she feel in love with you by your actions.
If this relationship is new, let me tell you a secret. If you want to win her heart, you have to win all of us...yes, all 10 of us. If you can get a place of honour in the hearts of our parents, of me, of our 4 brothers and our 3 other sisters, then you will get a greater place of honour in her heart. This is no easy task, but if you are right for her, you will accept this challenge, and work so hard for it because you know how worth it it will be.
And, just so you know, flowers and chocolate are always a good idea. Never listen to what she says...she really does want them. Unless she's on a diet. Then just go with the flowers. :)
Lastly, and most importantly, take her to Mass and love God wayyyy more then you love her. This is crucial to a good, holy relationship. You will be able to love her with a depth you've never known if you always put God first. And, you'll get some wonderful love in return. And, your relationship will be greater then either of you have ever dreamt.
I hope to get to know you better, and I hope for your sake that I like you. I'm just kidding...If she does, I will. But treat her right, okay? No need for a broken heart here. You know her fiery passion, and you don't want it aimed at you. Trust me. I have experience.
I am praying for you. Just know that, even if I give you a hard time, I am always praying. Because, at the end of the day, she's my little sister and I adore her, and I am trusting you with a piece of her heart.
Love,
Emily
"If you don't understand how a woman could both love her sister dearly and want to wring her neck at the same time, then you were probably an only child."
-Linda Sunshine
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