As You Walk

Just a quick thought for your Friday:

Your path to Heaven has been paved with rough wooden beams of heavy wood; large, rusty nails that tear flesh; the anger of a world hurting from lack of truth; a sharp, piercing ring of thorns; a treacherous, uphill climb, flanked by people waiting for you to fail.

It has been paved by a long, winding, dangerous journey with people crying for your pain, and praying constant prayers for you, and it has been brightened by the light of the promise of a beautiful, indescribable, glorious eternity by the one who walked it first... a gentleman who adored you enough to die for you. Some two million years ago.

May God be with you on your journey...whatever form it takes. No one said it would be easy...in fact, He showed us how far from easy it would be.

Emily xo

Large Family Don't Care-Part 2

As promised, here is part two.

This post will focus on the benefits of a large family, and why they are important, not only to the members of the family, but to society as a whole.

1. Being part of a large family never allows for boredom. There is always something to be done. And, if you do have a moment of down time then there are things you truly want to do...like read a good book, watch a show, write a letter, surf the internet. And, you really enjoy whatever you are doing during that downtime.

2. I am never lonely. There is always someone to talk to or hang out with. And, on the very rare occasion there isn't then you embrace the peacefulness of the moment!

3. Someone always has your back. Just last week my sister told me that our brother stood up to a young man that said some very rude things to her. He has her back. It's like having built in body guards.

4. Outfit opportunities are endless. Boys may not appreciate this, but girls sure do! When you have sisters who are close to your size you can share clothes and shoes and it's great!

5. You have a built in, brutally honest opinion panel. Siblings don't tend to sugar coat things. If you want to know how an outfits looks and get a 100% honest answer, ask the 10 year old boy.

6. It is fabulous relationship discernment. When I began dating my boyfriend I wanted someone who would not only love me, but my family. Someone who understood dating with purpose (meaning, discernment of marriage) and who was good with children. A man who was faithful and not afraid to pray. Having a large family allowed for me to see how wonderful he is with children, and how he was not afraid to pray the rosary with my family after dinner when he was over.

7. Large families help you learn about life. Having the 'talk' isn't nearly as bad when you can look around and see the product of it (meaning children). It helps you be better able to embrace the fact that sex is a beautiful thing and nothing to be ashamed of. And, it helps you understand why it belongs only within a marriage.
Bonding and babies people! Bonding and Babies!

8. You have built in friends who cannot abandon you, even if they want to! Muhahahha! Seriously though, I remember going through losing friends and growing apart from friends. It is hard and it stinks. But, knowing I had my sisters at home who would never do that to me was a huge source of comfort.

9. You learn and understand about the opposite sex. Having brothers is fantastic. Because, I am able to understand how their minds work, how to best relate to them, and what they enjoy. This is something I can apply in every aspect of my life when I encounter males in the workplace, school, etc.

10. I never have to question love. I know what love is because I see it active and alive in my parents and siblings. I know what a marriage is supposed to look like, and I know how to love those around me, even when I hate them.
This is the greatest gift.

Go have yourself some big families!!

-Emily xox

A History of the Walls

A few weeks ago a house burnt down. It was late at night and my sister woke me to show me the orange flames that lit up the black sky. Panic is my first instinct. But, we soon learned it was an abandoned house, and the entire thing burnt to the ground that night.

I am thankful the house was abandoned and that no one lost their home that night, and that no one was hurt. But, it was kind of sad at the same time. Because, at one point that was someone's home.

I love old things...I know this sounds silly, but I do. I love elderly people and find them fascinating to speak to. I love to listen to their stories, even when their memory fails them. I love how the look at me with eyes that have been clouded with passing time. I love how the call me dear and hold my hand while I talk to them. I love the wrinkles that are on their face and on their hands because it means they have lived a life that may have not been easy, but was worth it.

I love antique things. I love the history that is told in every scratch and scrape along a tabletop. I love the imperfections in the make of an old chair that means it was made at home, with hours of labour. I love the way antique stores smell and the people who own them. I love that if the furniture could speak they could tell me stories of babies being born, or children with a hurt knee and the Momma who kissed it better. They could tell me of the smell of the kitchen while bread was baking and about the hands of the farmer who guided the plough.

I love old houses. We have a lot of these where I live. Big, old farm houses that are stunning. I love how these houses were made to withstand the tests of time. I love how the floors are crooked, and the stairs are steep. I love how the windows make the world look like you are looking through a fun house mirror, and how the pains rattle when there is a storm. And, I love the stories the walls could tell if they could speak.

Imagine...

Think of all the memories you have with your own family. Imagine what the walls could tell you about everything they have seen in the last 200 years, and of the families who were raised there. They could tell you about the people who walked through the doorway and about the laughter that filled the home. The could tell you about the support the offered when men and woman leaned against them as they gave way to sorrowful tears. They could tell me about babies that were rocked to sleep and that grew up into handsome young men. They could tell me about young ladies dressing in an upstairs bedroom in a beautiful wedding gown. And about how all the crops died one year, and there wasn't enough food on the table. They could tell me stories of love, sorrow and joy; of family, friendship and romance; of laughter, tears and hiccups. Wouldn't that be neat??

I love the memories, stories and history that is held within an elderly person or an old home. It is a beautiful legacy of life and death and one that should be treasured.

-Emily xo

Men of Courage

A few weeks ago I posted about the movie Courageous, and how wonderful it was. The thing I loved about the movie was that it encouraged men to be men, and to stand up for their families. It promoted Men of Courage and of good value, and Heaven knows we need more men like that!

When I attended the March for Life on May 9th, 2013 I saw a young man, probably in his late 20s, with a sign that broke my heart. I wish I had taken a photo of him, but I remember what his sign said. At the March, there were of course, pro-choice folks out who were protesting our protest. For the most part they were all gathered together in one area, behind a fence and police officers. There were topless woman tossing condoms into the street at us (yes, thank you pro-choicers, we would love to have condoms. I am not sure if you noticed, but we are actually protesting the use of them) and chanting, "Get your rosaries of our ovaries" (this deserves a whole other post, but I would just like to point out that this chant makes zero sense AND does not rhyme.)

Anyway, back to this young man. He was off by himself, and I actually saw him at a few different parts of the March. He was walking with us I guess, but protesting us at the same time. He was totally alone every time I saw him, and I actually felt very sorry for him. His sad sign read,

"Men- Back off.

It's Her Body!" 

I think it is easy for us, as pro-lifers, to look at him and judge him for being a coward. Which, I guess he is. But, in his mind he is doing a great thing. See, I imagine this is what he is thinking... that he is helping to free and liberate women for the awful, traditional men who would embrace their fatherhood, and have a say in what happens to the little life they helped create within a woman's body. But, here is the reality, women don't need men to say, "It's your body, so it's your choice. Do what you want." I think that women think that that is what they want because they are often scared and angry in the face of an unwanted pregnancy. But no woman wants the father of the baby she's carrying to not care what happens to her or their child. She wants a man to help her make a decision.

I am fully aware that a lot of times the decision they make together could still end in abortion, and that saddens me, of course. Because, men who have a say in what happens to their child still may not recognize the new life growing inside the woman as a new person, but rather as a blob of tissue. But this is a step in the right direction. At least men would be stepping up and, recognizing the little one as a new life will come.

We need men to care about life. We need men to have an opinion. Especially in this area! We need men to come aboard the pro-life movement, and recognize their fatherhood. It's cowardly to say it's the woman's decision! Did you not have a part in placing that new life there, sir? Yes, yes you did. So you get a say in what happens next (and I hope and pray that that say is one for life!). Our world needs men of courage to stand up for life, and help women instead of 'liberating' them.

Thank you, so, so much for every single man who defends life. You are doing a wonderful, beautiful thing. Thank you for acknowledging your role and your Fatherhood. You are a credit to your gender.

Please join me in praying for this young man...and for all other men who join him in this passive viewpoint of abortion and in their wrongly placed passion for women's rights. 

God bless you,

-Emily xo

A New Mr. and Mrs.

On Saturday, May 4th, Troy and I attended a beautiful wedding ceremony for friends of mine. I could barely contain my joyful tears as I watched Sarah's father walk her, a stunningly beautiful bride, down the aisle of the lovely Church, as the musicians played a lively, gorgeous song. Beneath her veil, Sarah's face glowed. When they reached the end of the aisle her father lifted the long veil from her face, kissed her cheek and  gave her away. 

But, the most beautiful part was Tyler's face as he watched his bride walk down the aisle toward him. The love for her was so evident in his eyes and in his smile. It made my heart happy to witness the kind of beautiful love he had for her. 

The rest of the ceremony was wonderful. The love Tyler and Sarah had for one another was so clear. And, even more clear was their love for God. They loved Him first, and loved one another because of Him. That is the greatest gift of all.

Congratulations Tyler and Sarah! My love and prayers are with you as you begin your new life together! 

-Emily xoxo

'Honor Begins at Home' - 'Courageous' Marriages

The other night my family & I watched the movie Courageous. If you haven't seen it, I highly recommend it! This wasn't the first time I had seen it, but it had been awhile. Anyway, one of the lines of the movie really struck me, & I wanted to share it with you.

One of the men in this movie says something really simple, yet profound, when speaking to his friends & co-workers.

"People do not fight for their marriage any more...divorce happens because people make it an option."

I am not here to pass judgement on anyone, and I know that terrible things sometimes happen behind the doors of marriages. There are legitimate reasons for some divorces, or actually, annulments, if that's the case. But I am not getting into that today. Today I am just talking about the option of divorce.

I think the most important thing to remember is love is not a feeling. Sometimes we feel love, but not always. Sometimes your spouse will drive you crazy. Sometimes the things you loved about them when you first met turn into the things you cannot stand. But, that's what being in love is. It's dealing with the big and little things. And, I think that most people have the wrong idea when they enter a marriage.

They may feel in love. They may think, "I could spend the rest of my life with this person." But, in the back of their mind there is this subconscious voice of years of society influence saying, "But if you can't, that's okay too. If you stop feeling in love with them, you can get a divorce." I am not saying people enter into marriages casually because they know they have an easy out, but I am saying that that thought does cross their mind, and they may not even be aware of it. It's terrifying that society has that much power over us.

What needs to happen is, when people enter into a marriage, they agree it is worth fighting for. How did you win the other's heart in the first place? You fought for them. Probably not physically (but you never know), but you fought to win their love and affection, and once you had it you felt in love. If it's true love, it doesn't end because the feeling goes away. You still love them, you just may have to fight harder to see the fruits.

We cannot enter into marriage, knowing it's disposable if it doesn't go the way you planned. If that's the mindset we have, it is over before it began, because we never gave it a chance in the first place. We allow ourselves an easy escape when things get tough. And we have all heard that saying that 'anything worth having is worth fighting for.'

This is true in every area of our lives, and it is even more true in marriages!

Anyway, the quote speaks for itself, and I am sure you could have done without my ramblings, but it is something I feel passionately about! If you are married, keep this quote in your heart, and don't let anything remove it! And, if you are not married, treasure this quote, and keep it close because you may need it one day!

"People do not fight for their marriage any more...divorce happens because people make it an option."

-Courageous 

Trust

Last night my Father and my Brother came over for dinner. My brother had a basketball game, that ended abruptly with a trip to the hospital for a grossly dislocated finger. Since the hospital is near my apartment I called and asked if they'd like to come for something to eat. They accepted the invitation and we had a lovely supper together.

After they left I was thinking of something. First, how rare it is for my father, brother and I to have a conversation, without interruption, that lasted more the two minutes. Not that we don't try to bond or anything, just that in our home, growing up in the craziness, there just wasn't time for sit down, long chats.

The second thing I realized was how important my relationship is with these two men. Awhile ago I had a chat with my Mom about my relationship with my Dad. I was saying how I trust him to help me make decisions about my car, or purchasing a home, because I know he'll do what's best for me, and he knows what he's talking about. She was remarking about how interesting it is how, at the beginning of our lives that is very much the role of our fathers. We trust their judgement and respect their decision making. Then later in life, God willing, when we get married, that becomes the role of our husbands. We trust them to be the head of our relationship and the head of our homes, spiritually and otherwise.

So, I realized that although I am in a committed relationship with a man whom I plan on marrying, I still rely on my father for certain judgement calls. I also noticed that my brother is no longer a little kid, and I have noticed myself going to him with questions about my car, and other such things. I think it's my instinct to go to them because I know that, no matter what, they will stand by me. That is why we see brothers who give their sister's boyfriends a hard time, and men who ask their girlfriend's father for permission before marrying her.

It is so important to let men to men, and to trust them with our heart and souls (be careful and discerning about this, however!) In a world where more and more woman are fighting for independence and feminism, it is important to remember that traditional family roles still have a very important place in our world, as I have mentioned before. Men need to know that their opinion and knowledge is valued. Today, build up the men in your life, don't tear them down!

Blessings,

Emily xo

Daddy's Little Girl

My Father is an amazing man. I mean, as the primary breadwinner for a family of eleven, how could he not be? But, I have not always recognized that about him.

About two years ago I went through some serious healing that brought me to the realization I have today, that my Father is truly an amazing Father, Husband, Friend, Brother and Son. This healing came about during my training for my year serving with NET, the fall of 2010.

The spring of 2010 I had graduated from High School, and throughout most of those four years, sadly, my Father and I were at odds. See, my Daddy is not perfect. He is not the most affectionate man, and he often picks apart what we, my siblings and I, do. I am sure it is not to hurt us, but to challenge us. But, as a young teenage girl (who was, and is, very sensitive)  I didn't see it as a challenge to grow, work harder and become more fully who God created me to be. I saw it as an insult and that I would never be good enough to please my Father.

Dad and I fought a lot through those years. He could not wrap his mind around the fact that what he said hurt me. He only saw what he was trying to do- challenge me or joke with me (he is also a huge teaser, and I didn't always find it funny). I remember on numerous occasions calling my boyfriend in tears and saying that my Dad didn't love me, he didn't understand me and I could not wait to get away. Deep in my heart I knew that wasn't true, but at the time I felt heart broken by his continuous criticism. 

However, the fall after graduation I started my training for my year on NET, and one day we focused all on "the Father". We were discussing God the Father, andH is constant love for us, and how are earthly fathers are just that, earthly and human! Human- not perfect, but broken, faulted human beings striving for the Kingdom, whether they know it or not. That moment was so healing for me. We went on talking about how, no matter what our relationship was with our Father, we could heal and grow from it, and we have to keep in mind that they are no more perfect then we are.

For the first time I was able to see my Father as the loving caring man he is. I was able to recognize he was not perfect, but he so badly wanted to love me perfectly, and he wanted me to be as perfect as possible so I could one day spend forever with him in Heaven.

That day I forgave my Father for any hurt he had caused and I also made a promise to myself and to God that I would try to understand him better. That I would laugh at his jokes and stop seeing it as a personal attack, that I would forgive him when he hurt me, and that I would see his criticism as an opportunity to look more deeply at myself and see room for change. I realized that having a relationship with my Father needed to be worked on, and may not come easily, but it was so important!

My Dad and I are friends now. I trust him to help me make wise decisions, and to teach me knew things. And, even though I no longer live at home, I still rely on him. My Mom and I were chatting the other day about me purchasing a home, and I said that I would never do it without Dad's advice. She told me that right now my Father is like what a husband is when you get married. When you're married you trust your husband to make good decisions for you and for your family, and to help you and give you advice about certain things. She said right now that is what my Dad does for me. Although I have a boyfriend who I love dearly and we do plan on getting married, right now my Father is the main man I trust for decisions like purchasing a house. I do take into account the opinions and advice of my boyfriend and would not do anything he did not approve of, but at this time in my life I trust my Father to be with me also.

I thought that was such a neat explanation! Parents can be so wise!

Anyway, enough rambling. Go out there and love your Fathers.

God bless,
Emily xo