Impending Doom...

Lent began on Wednesday. I hope yours is going well so far. 

Today, I was thinking about how I feel about Lent. When I know Lent is approaching I feel my heart fill with impending doom... I suppose it's natural. I mean, I am human. I don't like to be uncomfortable. Who does? I like eating what I want, when I want it and to drink what I please and to do things that are excessive and fun. So, of course the thought of Lent is somewhat depressing... I am about to make choices about how I will be uncomfortable for, not an hour or two or even a week or two, but for 40 days. That's a long time.

Please, tell me I am not the only one who feels this way! Please!

Although it's human nature to enter Lent with these feelings it doesn't mean it is good for me. My goal this Lent is to view it with more joy. To just be altogether more joy-filled. So, how will I do this you ask?

1. I once had a priest who used to say that we should live this Lent as if it's our last. Now, that doesn't sound all that joyful. But, I need to start viewing this Lent as my last opportunity to re-shape my spirituality & to create the Emily that God intended. That should be a task that is delightful (hard- but amazing!)! 

2. Remind myself, ALL THE TIME, that my fasting from meat, cleaning the bathroom or waking up early are a wimpy little sacrifices in comparison to say, dying on a cross.

3. Viewing Lent as an opportunity, not a task. This is a chance to let God kick my spiritual butt & whip me into shape. It's a chance to make changes and become better.

4. Count my blessings. Lent tends to consume us (or, at least me) with thoughts of what we are doing without and we often forget that we have been given so much. I mean, just look around yourself right now. I can make a list a mile long of all the things around me I am thankful for, but I never view the world in that way. If I take time to count my blessings this Lent I will be unable to contain my joy. 

How will you find joy this Lent?

Emily xo

Christmas is Coming-1st Sunday of Advent

Happy 1st week of Advent, everyone!

Be Ready...

Today we light the first purple candle on our wreath. And, the focus of this week is "Be Ready". The Latin meaning of the word Advent is 'coming'. For Catholics, it means the Lord is coming and we are preparing for Him. The entire purpose of Advent is to 'be ready'. Focusing on it for the first week sets the base for the next four weeks as we ready our souls and hearts for Jesus' birth.

How are you going to prepare and be ready for our King?

Here are some suggestions for you;

-go to Confession. Start Advent off right and with a clean slate.

-Come up with an Action. As Catholics, we don't necessarily give something up, or fast, during Advent as we do during Lent. However, this is a high, holy season. I suggest maybe choosing something to do, rather then something to not do. For example, pick one thing, each day that you will do to either improve you spiritual well being or something you will do for someone else.

-Make an Advent Calendar. Our society has all these crazy, candy filled Advent calendars. I suggest that you don't buy those. Make your own, minus the candy {I know, that's less fun, but remember we are preparing for our King...you will get lots of treats on Christmas, when He arrives & we are in full celebratory mode!}. Instead of treats & what not, write the feast days of Saints that fall through Advent so you remember to meditate on their lives {St. Nicholas, Our Lady of Guadalupe, St. Lucy...}. On other days have little tasks like, 'bake cookies for someone who's lonely' or little prayers. You can also have things like, 'say three Hail Mary's for someone who's sick this Christmas'.

-Attend Mass. If you are able, attend Mass more than just on Sundays. It's good spiritual exercise.

Have a holy, good first week of Advent. I am praying for you.

-Emily xo

Pray More

I have this printed off and posted by my desk in my room. It is getting me through school, as I prepare for the end of my first semester, and for my first clinical placement!

I hope it can help you also.

Emily xo

What do we have to be Thankful for?

Happy Thanksgiving weekend, Canada!

What are you thankful for?

and so, so much more!

May many blessing be poured upon you and your family as you count your blessings this Thanksgiving!

Emily xo

Being Catholic in College

This September I began college for the first time. Yes, I have been finished high school for 3 and a half years, but I never went to college. Yes, I got a lot of flack for that. Thankfully, not from my parents, siblings or boyfriend. But, flack all the same, particularly from some very opinionated extended family who seemed to think their input was desired in every aspect of my life, including the ago I should be married, and what my hourly wage should be.

       

 

Kelly & I

The truth is, I never went to school because I never felt I should go. God knows I prayed & begged him to place a desire for it in my heart, so I could see some direction in my life. But, it was never there. I applied to College once, 2 years ago, and declined my acceptances because it felt wrong. But, what felt right? That I couldn't figure out. 

Which brings me to where I am now, in college studying to be a Personal Support Worker. I am there because I knew God was calling me to serve, and this seemed to the place where my heart found rest. 

However, it was more then not feeling God calling me to College that was keeping me away. I was afraid. Not of school, I enjoy learning. Not of making friends, I think I am fairly likable. I was afraid for my faith. I am keenly aware that my faith is a gift from God, one I will never take for granted. And, my entire life I am been in environments that fostered and encouraged my faith. I lived in a good Catholic home, I went to amazing Catholic schools, I had great Catholic friends, I feel in love with a wonderful Catholic man, I served in a beautiful Catholic ministry. I even worked for Catholics. But, I knew College wouldn't be like that, and I was terrified that my faith wouldn't be strong enough to withstand a nearly God-less culture-the culture of death.

I know I cannot be the only Catholic with this same perception of College. I certainly hope I am not, anyway! So, as I began College I had a couple of goals.

1. I wanted to remain & grow strong in my faith, not falter & let it fall. I wanted this experience to test me in ways I hadn't been tested, having spent most of my life around like minded Catholics. I wanted to be driven to me knees in prayer in ways I hadn't been before.

2. I wanted to find community. If nothing else, I know that my very being needs community. I am a very introverted person, so this can sometimes be challenging for me to see & understand, but still I know it's true. I want to find even one person who shares my faith & views with whom I can grow, spiritually.

3. I wanted to love more deeply. This may seem a little bizarre. It is, actually. But, I knew attending college would present me with endless opportunities to disagree with those around me-be it in the classroom or out. I would disagree with things taught in the classroom because of my moral stance. I would disagree with the lifestyles of my peers based on what I know to be true, life-giving & holy. 

In other words, I would make enemies. So, I needed to learn how to love more deeply. Because love is the single most effective way to be an evangelist. Which brings me to my next point.

4. I wanted to minister & evangelize. This is my duty & responsibility as a Catholic, and I knew College would test my ability in this area. I wanted to become well spoken in what I believe, but more then that, I wanted to live a life that was ministry enough.

Preeeaaaccchh ITTT, St. Francis!

So, is being Catholic in College difficult? Oh yes! But is it possible? Matthew 19:26, ladies & gentlemen. I think the most important thing to remember is this;

My prayers are with you...please pray for me as well!

Emily xo

Prayer & Fasting

Dear Pope Francis has proclaimed today a day of fasting & prayer for Peace-specifically for peace in Syria. 

Please, join in this prayer today!

Emily xo

Catholic Canadian? Can I be Both?

I am a Canadian, and a Roman Catholic. I take pride in both of these facts, but have discovered that one, by far, outweighs the other when it comes to how I live my life & how I define myself. Sometimes I cannot be both a Canadian AND a Catholic.

           

What does it mean to be a Canadian Citizen?
According to the Canadian Government it means to have these values;
Equality, Respect for Cultural Differences, Freedom, Peace, Law & Order.

Does that not make this nation sound like some sort of Utopia? Yes, of course it does. That is why we are so multicultural (Google "what does it mean to be a Canadian"- you will find tons of articles headlining that we are multicultural).

Equality sounds lovely, doesn't it? In the Government article linked above it describes equality in this way;

We respect everyone's rights. Everyone has the right to speak out and express ideas that others might disagree with. Governments must treat everyone with equal dignity and respect- two other fundamental Canadian values. 

Perfect? Well, maybe not. Here is the thing-everyone is not equal. They should be, but they are not. This nation has taken equality to mean that every person should have the rights to live as the wish, not as they should. And, as a Roman Catholic, I often disagree with how they go about this.

For example- I believe that homosexuality is spiritually immoral. I believe it to be sinful, detrimental to society, a mental illness/imbalance. I believe homosexuality is wrong. Always.

Now, I believe people who are homosexual deserve to be treated with the same dignity and respect as every other person on the planet, but I also believe that they are living lives of hardship, sin (if they are practicing their homosexuality), and lives that can, ultimately, destroy their souls.

I know it is my responsibility, as a Catholic, striving for Heaven, to help, guide, and encourage them on paths that will get them to Heaven (God willing). This means I still speak kind words, I still open doors for them. It means I visit with them and befriend them. It means I live my life in a way that exemplifies the teachings of the Catholic Church, in every aspect of my life. It means that I may never have to use words to tell them that the cross they've been given in life, like all our crosses, can lead them far from the gates of Heaven. It means my very life will, hopefully, be ministry enough to bring them home to our God.

As a Canadian, I am expected to smile & say, "good for them!" as Pride Parades sweep our nation every summer. It means I am not permitted to be uncomfortable by public displays of affection, involving two people of the same gender (even if I would be repulsed by the same display between a man & a woman). It means I cannot say that I believe homosexuality is a temptation, a cross, or a sin.

As a Canadian, I am expected to take the meaning of "equality" as everyone is the same, and others may live their lives as the wish- be it as homosexuals, pro-abortionist, those engaging in pre/post-marital sex...the list goes on.

As a Catholic, I believe everyone person is given crosses to bear in life. We struggle with different temptations for sin, and battle interior battles often. Homosexuality is one of those crosses. It is a temptation. I acknowledge that. I am always amazed when I hear stories of men & women who struggle with homosexuality, and are able to choose lives of chastity and purity. What a challenge that must be! See, homosexuals are called to lives of purity & chastity, the same as every other single person, dating, engaged and married couple are (here for more information). To not live in that way is a sin. No ifs, ands or buts.

As a Catholic I know that equality means treating everyone as my brother & sister, and loving them, despite their imperfections. I know it means encouraging & helping others out of their temptations for sin & into lives of fulfillment and faith. It means leaning on my brothers & sisters in Christ when I am weak & struggling with my own crosses.It does not mean applauding behavior that is morally detrimental, but rather calling people out of that and into lives where they can be truly happy.

As a traditionally Christian nation, I understand what the Canadian government is striving for. They have taken good, solid Christian values into account when building up this country but they are misinformed on how to properly execute their implementation into our Provinces and Territories. We have taken everything to an extreme to avoid stepping on anyone's toes or insulting anyone. Those are good intentions. However, they have forgotten to take into account that maybe not all behaviors, ways of life, procedures and ideas are appropriate, life-giving, fulfilling and good. Every good society needs restrictions, guide lines and rules. We are imperfect humans, all of us, and we cannot live without rules of some kind. So, where does this "to each his own" mentality draw it's line? It seems very blurry to me...

-Emily xo

Blessed Emily

No, no, not me. I wish!

Today is the feast day of Blessed Emily Bicchieri. Maybe you've never heard of her...I hadn't. So, in honour of her feast day I am going to share what I have learned about her story.

Emily Bicchieri was born on May 3, 1238 in Vercelli, Italy. Her mother passed away when Emily was very young, and with a desire for a mother in her life she placed herself under the care of our Mother in Heaven.

Emily's father had plans for his daughter to be married and have a family. Emily pleaded with her father to construct a convent. Her heart's desire was to pursue religious life in the Third Order of St. Dominic. Her father built a convent outside of the city, which was later dedicated to St. Margaret.

When Emily was only 20 she became abbess of the convent. Having been elected, against her will, as Prioress, she governed and lead the new community very well. She was tactful, faithful, and strongly insisted on her community being pure with their intentions. Blessed Emily was very diligent about never telling anyone to do something she herself would not do.

Receiving Communion regularly was uncommon at this time, yet Emily received Our Lord frequently. She had such a love and adoration for the Passion of Our Lord. At a time, she felt she was receiving Our Lord too often, and she felt a need for humility. She chose to fast, for a time, from going to Communion. It was then Our Lord appeared to her, and asked His Spouse to return to His Banquet Table.

She was known for having visions, as well as for miracles Our Father performed through her.

Blessed Emily passed away of illness on her birthday, May 3rd, in 1314.  She was 76 years old. She was beatified by Pope Clement XIV. Her feast day is celebrated on August 19th.

Bl. Emily, please pray for us. Help us to cling to our Heavenly Mother, and find a model of womanhood in her. Pray that we might have a renewed fervour for Our Lord's passion, and his very true, and holy presence in the Eucharist. May we come before our Heavenly Father with a new adoration. Amen.

As You Walk

Just a quick thought for your Friday:

Your path to Heaven has been paved with rough wooden beams of heavy wood; large, rusty nails that tear flesh; the anger of a world hurting from lack of truth; a sharp, piercing ring of thorns; a treacherous, uphill climb, flanked by people waiting for you to fail.

It has been paved by a long, winding, dangerous journey with people crying for your pain, and praying constant prayers for you, and it has been brightened by the light of the promise of a beautiful, indescribable, glorious eternity by the one who walked it first... a gentleman who adored you enough to die for you. Some two million years ago.

May God be with you on your journey...whatever form it takes. No one said it would be easy...in fact, He showed us how far from easy it would be.

Emily xo

Yes. No. Not Now.

A few weeks ago at Mass our Priest today a story during his homily that went like this,

Years ago he was teaching a First Communion class, and the room was filled with Grade 2 students. They were discussing prayer at this particular class, and one little boy near the front spoke up and said,

"Father, I don't pray."

When Father asked him why he didn't pray the little boy adamantly declared that God didn't answer prayers. So, Father asked him why he thought God didn't hear and answer prayers. The little boy responded,

"Well, I was praying for a long time that I would get a new bicycle for my birthday. My birthday was months ago, and I never got a bicycle." 

Apparently, a young girl near the back of the class disagreed with this boy's announcement. She spoke up, saying, 

"Johnny, God does answer prayers. His answer to your prayer was 'NO'."

This little story received a few chuckles from the parishioners. And, rightfully so. But, I think this young girl was probably way more wise then any of us sitting on the wooden pews that warm July morning. See, she understood that sometimes God says no. And, that is something most of us spend our lifetime struggling with. Or, at least I do.


God answers prayers in three ways:

Yes

His 'yes' means that what we desired and what he knew was best for us were actually in line. 

He said 'yes' because what we wanted was good, wholesome and worthy of our time.

His 'yes' was not an affirmation that we always know what is best, but it is an affirmation that He is a loving God who desires us to ask for what we need, and to accept whatever answer He gives us.

No

This is a humble reminder that we are not God. God is God, and He knows what is best for us.

His 'no' wasn't Him exercising is power to make us angry. It was Him reminding us that He has a great, grand plan in which He only gives us the things we ask for that will make us better.

His 'no' reminds us to be humbled.

Not now

Sometimes we misconstrue God's 'not now' for a 'no'. We think He is not giving us the desires of our heart, but really He is teaching us patience, and He is asking us to just hold on, for a better time is coming.

He will give us what we desire when the time is right, and just because we think that time is right now doesn't mean it is.

Remember, God sees the larger picture.

So, I hope you always know God answers your prayers the very best way, even if you don't see it that way right now. It is hard. I will be the first to admit that. But, it is something we will need to work on for our whole lives. 

I am praying for you, please also pray for me.

Emily xo 

Saint Maria, Pray for Us!

Happy Feast of Saint Maria Goretti! 

This image was recognized my Maria's mother to be a close likeness of her daughter, so I thought it would be lovely to include on this day. You can visit my previous posts about St. Maria, or this Catholic Fire article to find out more about this wonderful young lady and her awesome courage.

Cardinal Salotti, after Maria's death, said,

"Even if she had not been a martyr, she would still have been a saint, so holy was her everyday life."

God bless,

Emily xo

O, Canada

Yesterday, July 1st, was Canada Day!

To all you fellow Canadians out there, I hope you enjoyed your day of red and white!

On Sunday morning my boyfriend & I went to Mass together, and as the final song, the choir asked the congregation to join in the singing of O Canada. I stood my straightest, with my hands at my side.

Sunday evening my family invited over a bunch of my extended family. We had red and white cupcakes and napkins. We ate and drank and celebrated.

Last night my boyfriend and I went to the celebrations in his home town and watched the fireworks and listened to the laughing children and cheering adults from his truck, parked up on a hill.

Today, I carry on with my life and go to work and love my family and breath a silent prayer of thanks for my life here.

I am proud of being a Canadian, and am immeasurably grateful that I was born in this country. But, every year on Canada Day I find it challenging to be so proud of a nation that is so falsely wonderful.

 We are too polite and politically correct to call a spade a spade and to call one another out when something is wrong. Oh yes, we have legalized gay marriage, how progressive of us. Never mind that is a sin and we are a Christian nation. We have removed God from everywhere possible (with the exception of out National Anthem, but I am sure that is coming), when we have scripture quotes engraved in the Peace Tower on Parliament Hill that have stood the test of time.

We have immigration rates that are sky high which is the only reason we are able to sustain our population. Immigration is wonderful, but we cannot allow the murder of millions of unborn Canadian babies to happen because we are too 'politically correct' to enforce any sort of law in this regard. It is pathetic that we need to rely on people fleeing their own countries in order to sustain our own country.

I am proud that I am a Catholic Canadian, and that I live in a nation that allows me to be so. I am shamed by how ungodly our nation is, and how we have given evil an upper hand. But, I am far from being proud of this country. We are not doing justice to our ancestors who founded this place.

God bless this nation,

Emily xo

Novena to Saint Maria

In nine days we will be celebrating the feast day of Saint Maria Goretti. She is a saint whom I have held near and dear to my heart for many years, and pray to often. I previously posted an article about her life that I have linked below for you to check out if you don't know about her.

Anyway, seeing as there are nine days until her feast day, July 6th, I wanted to do a post about beginning a novena to her. This novena will be said once a day from now until her feast day. The last day will be July 6th. I was thinking it should be offered for purity, in ourselves, but especially among young people.

If you wish to pray the novena, here it is.

Novena to Saint Maria Goretti

Saint Maria Goretti, strengthened by God' grace, you did not hesitate, even at the age of eleven, to sacrifice life itself to defend your virginal purity. Look graciously on the unhappy human race that has strayed far from the path of eternal salvation. Teach us all, and especially our youth, the courage and promptness that will help us avoid anything that could offend Jesus. Obtain for me a great horror of sin, so that I may live a holy life on earth and win eternal glory in Heaven. Please intercede for me in obtaining the favour I now ask.

Amen.

(Mention your request)

Recite one Our Father, one Hail Mary and one Glory Be

Link to previous post about St. Maria here.

Link to another article about St. Maria, and where I got this novena from here.

-Emily xo

My Unbelief

I don't remember where I first heard this but I do know it is one of the best pieces of advice I have ever received.

Someone once told me that sometimes, when it gets too hard to offer a prayer, and when we cannot feel God's love, that is okay. This was something I couldn't understand...but what they said next struck me.

In that moment, when we feel so far from God, the most important prayer to pray is this,

"Lord, help my unbelief."

Sometimes it is so hard to see God working in our life and Satan works in that. Dry spells of faith are not abnormal. Heck, Blessed Mother Teresa went through dry spells of faith all the time! If she went through them then of course we will too! But, we have to remember that that does not mean God is not there or that He has abandoned us. However, unbelief is tempting in that moment. That is when this simple prayer comes into play.

"Lord, help my unbelief."

In those four words we surrender ourselves to our King and humble ourselves before Him. We invite Him into that darkness to spread faith once again. Remember, He is a gentleman. He needs to be asked in, he will not barge through the doors of our hearts if we close them with unbelief.

Let us all make this our prayer today. Jesus, please help the little bits of unbelief that are in all of us! Amen.

Prayers,

Emily xo

The Power of a Prayer

A few years ago I remember I was going through a really trying time in my life. There wasn't anything specifically wrong, but I just felt frustrated in myself and in my relationship with God. And, I was just so confused.

I have always believed that God has a plan for each of us, and that that plan is older then time. God knows what he created us for. I grew up learning this from my parent's, at school and at Church and as I got older I believed it to be true from the experiences I had in my life. But, at this time in my life I felt very unsure of God's plan in my life, and very unsettled about where I was and what I was doing. I felt that maybe He had forgotten about me, and when I ran to Him in prayer that maybe He didn't hear me.

One night I got into a fight with my father. I have no idea what it was about, or how it began, but I know it was the angriest I had ever been at someone. I felt hurt and unloved by my earthly father, and fed up that me heavenly Father didn't seem to take notice of my sorrow. That night I somehow had the peace of mind to leave our home and go to the Church (my family had a key, so I was able to get in). When I reached the Church I remember going in, while wiping streams of tears from my cheeks, and literally collapsing in front of the Tabernacle and crying out to Jesus. I begged Him for answers and for direction, and for peace in my heart. I cried and cried, and eventually I felt like He was holding me, just for a moment, in His arms.

I felt comforted.

Things didn't take a miraculous turn after that, and I didn't suddenly know where I was supposed to be headed in life. But, for one moment I felt that I was not alone. In that desperate prayer God reminded me that He had never forsaken me. I had simply forgotten how to see Him. He took me in His arms that night, rested my head against His heart and showed me how to see Him again.

Today I want to remind you of the power of a prayer. No matter where you have been, where you are going or how lost you have gotten, He is there. Always and without fail, He is holding you. Take a deep breathe and ask God to help you and carry you and show you how to see Him again. He will answer you, in His time, but the answer will be there. He promises us that.

I am praying for you,

Emily xo

Quote of the Day: Spreading the Word

"Find new ways to spread the word of God to every corner of the world."

-Pope Francis I

What a lovely reminder that as society changes and progresses (or, sometimes, regresses) so must our way of spreading the word of God around the world!

Thank you, Heavenly Father, for giving your Church a beautiful, wise, holy and humble man to lead us to a deeper, more profound relationship with you.

Many prayers,

Emily xo

Corpus Christi

Happy Feast of Corpus Christi! 

"In a world where there is so much noise, so much bewilderment, there is a need for silent adoration of Jesus concealed in the Host. Be assiduous in the prayer of adoration and teach it to the faithful. It is a source of comfort and light, praticularily to those who are suffering. With the Synod Assembly, therefore I heartily recommend to the Church's pastors and to the People of God the practice of Eucharistic Adoration, both individually and in community."

-Pope Benedict XVI, February 22, 2007, Sacramentum Caritatis, Post-Synodal Apostolic Exhortation 

-Emily xo

Sex Before Marriage: Why or Why Not?

This is a touchy subject, I am well aware of that. But, it is also one that I feel is worthy of discussion. This isn't so much about having sex before marriage as it is about when sex has a place and when it doesn't.

Society often portrays the start of a relationship as when you first have sex.We see that in movies all the time. It is after the couple has sex that they become serious and exclusive. I believe that is so wrong, but I also believe that it is societyies way of trying to make right of something that is morally wrong.

Often times Christians will say how terrible it is that society places so little value in sex, and that young men and women often have so many partners before settling down. I agree with that. However, I think that, although there are tons and tons of one night stands, often times serious and exclusive relationships only begin once two people have had sex. That is because their innermost being is calling out in that moment, and they feel a need for the commitment that accompanies that act. Subconsciously, they realize the error in their ways and are striving to make it right by making some sort of commitment to that person, even if it is only for a couple of days, a month or a year.We are trying to make right of something we know, intrinsicly, is wrong.

This is the truth. Yes, that is deep and profound, so get ready!

Marriage is always before sex. Marriage is the commitment of forever. It is promising your entire self to someone for as long as you live. Til death do us part. Sex is like a binding agent. It is like glue. It solidifies something that is already strong, and it deepens the bond between two people. That is why it is so incredibly heart breaking when it is done outside of a commitment as serious as marriage.

Sex is absolutely beautiful.

It is a wonderful gift that we need to treasure. There is nothing dirty or sinful or evil about sex. That comes when sex (like any gift) is used incorrectly. It should be something we defend and guard, for our sake as much as for the person we will one day marry (whom the gift was originally intended for). The bond that is sex cannot be separated from the act. You cannot have sex without a deep, irreplaceable bond, and you cannot have that same bond without having sex.

That last part is where people so often get lost and confused. Our very beings, right to our core, desire sex. That is a good thing. But a thing to be mastered. I am not married, but I am in a relationship, and have been for over 4 years. I love him with every fibre of my being, and I would be lying if I told you that I didn't want the bond with him that comes with sex. However, I am also aware that there is the slightest possibility God will call me to something different before we get married (this could happen even after you are engaged!!), so I don't want to form that bond, only to have it ripped from me. Break ups are heartbreaking enough without adding the tearing of an everlasting bond created during sex.

People often so badly want to solidify their relationship, and feel that deep bond with the one they love that they decide sex is the only way for that. And they are right, sex is the only way for that, but not right now. There is a time and a place for everything, and I promise you that the time for sex is when you are married.

There are phases in every relationship, and if you have ever dated anyone for any length of time you know what I mean. There is a honeymoon type phase in the early days, where everything is butterflies. Eventually that passes, and you may notice things that bother you about the other person and you'll have your first couple fight. Sometimes that is the breaking part for couples. But, if you get through that then you know there will be a time for strengthening and deepening of the relationship as you get to know this person more and more. As each phase passes and another comes along (this happens throughout your whole life, I just touched on a couple) you see your relationship change, flourish, grow, deepen and strengthen. Sometimes, somewhere in there you are called apart, and sometimes you are challenged to go further. In all of it there is a purpose. All of this is part of the journey of falling in love with a person. Once you've made the decision to marry this person, the growth does not stop at the engagement ring. Often times the engagement is the most temptation filled, and trying time (up to this point) in your relationship, and so you must persevere through that as well. Eventually, when you marry this person, that is when you are ready to make a commitment that is everlasting, and that is the place for sex.

To have sex before this point would mess up the natural progress of your relationship and add undo stress, pressure and confusion. Sex is a joining of the body, mind and soul, and belongs only after the sacrament of marriage has been received! That is when it is able to be experienced in it's full glory. Then, and only then.

I encourage all of you to wait. I cannot tell you from experience, but I can tell you from truth...It will be worth it!

Many prayers,

Emily xo

St. Maria Goretti, pray for us!

Why I Refuse 'Tolerance'

Merriam-Webster Definition of:

Tol-er-ance  noun

2 a: sympathy or indulgence for belief or practices differing from or conflicting with one's own
   b: the act of allowing something

Examples of tolerance
-a tolerance for other lifestyles

We live in a world where the only virtue we are permitted to teach our children is tolerance. And, not tolerance as in the above definition of the word, but tolerance as in accepting and not judging the lifestyles, beliefs, opinions and decisions of anyone else. Our society thinks that tolerance means we will live in a peaceful world, where no one bothers anyone else, under the banner of, "whatever works for them is fine, but I choose (fill in lifestyle or belief here)."

That is not what tolerance is. Tolerance is acknowledging that what someone is doing is in fact wrong and putting up with it to avoid further conflict. We do not tolerate things we love or things we approve of...like puppies, or nice days or children. We tolerate things we object to, like an obnoxious co-worker or a head ache or an annoying student. Tolerating those things does not mean we do not deal with them, it just means we put up with them. It does not mean we don't expect more from those people, and we encourage them to act in the way they are. We choose to address it in a respectful and tactful manner.

So, this is why I am objecting to tolerance. I refuse to 'tolerate' (societies meaning of the word) gay marriage, pre-marital or extra-marital sex, and thousands of other morally incorrect things. Today, I want to specifically speak about Gay 'Marriage' and why I refuse tolerance.

About a year or so ago I posted something on my Facebook page about the traditional and right marriage. That is, marriage between one man and one woman only. The feedback I received was appalling  And, keep in mind, this feedback is coming from people I have personal relationships with-family and friends. I could not believe how aggressive people got. One young woman I went to school with even went as far as to say that if I expressed these views publicly in society then I should be prepared for violence and even death. WHAT? Are you kidding me? I should be afraid of someone killing me because I believe in marriage?

But, that's what our world has come to. See, these people (most of whom are Catholic, by the way) who so adamantly agreed that I was being intolerant, disrespectful and judgemental honestly wished death on me. They didn't care what I believe and know to be true, or why I believe it. All they saw was that I was not living up to societies standard of being tolerant of other's lives, no matter what how they live or the decisions they make.

We don't have to accept the things that other people do that are wrong. We don't have to pretend that it is okay with us and that we don't care. We don't accept that a child got beat up on the playground because that is wrong. As Catholics, we believe gay marriage doesn't even exist. It is not a marriage or union of any kind, and if a gay couple choose to live out their lives as such, then it is a sin. Plain and simple. We are not inflicting our beliefs on society by believing that, and we are not at all being intolerant. What we are doing is speaking truth.

I am not saying we need to go about condemning gay couples. Of course we can't do that, because that to is a sin. However, we cannot go about pretending that their lifestyle is fine because it works for them. That too is a sin. Sin impacts the whole of society, even if we cannot see the surface of it. And, our goal, as Catholics, is to be evangelists by our mere existence  and we are not doing that by stooping to societies lie that, 'if it works for you, it's okay with me.'

We need to love gay couples, and show them Christ in that love. We need to care for them and teach them and lead them. We need to not pass judgement, nor encourage them and we definitely don't need to 'tolerate' the way they live! We just need to love them, despite their flaws, sins and imperfections. Love like Jesus loves, because, in reality, we have sins as deep as theirs that just may not be as obvious to the whole world.

I could go on and on about this. But, I challenge all of you to protect marriage in it's true & purest form. Never, ever settle or accept anything less. You are not being judgemental or cruel and you most certainly aren't wrong. Be totally, 100% convicted in what you believe, and share that by how you live out your life. Do not be ashamed for refusing to accept what society thinks in correct, and always speak truth.

Always keep in mind what John 15:18-25 says,

"If the world hates you, just remember that it has hated me first. If you belonged to the world, then the world would love you as its own. But I chose you from this world, and you do not belong to it; that is why the world hates you. Rememeber what I told you: 'Slaves are not greater than their master.' If people persecuted me, they will persecute you too; if they obeyed my teaching, they will obey yours too. But they will do all this to you because you are mine; for they do not know the one who sent me. They would not have been guilty of sin id I had not come and spoken to them, as it is, they no longer have an excuse for their sin. Whoever hates me hates my Father also. They would not have been guilty of sin if I had not done amounf then the things that no one else ever did, as it is, they have seen what I did, and they hate both me and my Father. This, however, was bound to happen so that what is written in their Law may come true, 'They hated me for no reason at all.'"

Blessings,
Emily xo

A Message in the Mess?

Last night, on my drive home, I was listening to a local Christian radio station. There was a speaker on there (who's name I do not know) talking to the host about Motherhood, and just womanhood in general. She spoke of some profound things that I thought were worth discussing.

The point of what she was discussing was basically that, as women, we are constantly comparing ourselves. She was speaking of motherhood, in particular, but it is something true of most every woman. One thing that really stuck out to me is when she said that, as a young mother, comparing herself was something she was having a very difficult time with and a friend said to her,

'Don't compare your insides to someone else's outsides.'

How true is that? I am not a mother, but I am a woman, and I try so hard not to compare myself to others, yet I always seem to be. I am not the type of person who likes to share my 'insides'. I hate people knowing that there may be even the slightest imperfection in my relationships, in my family, in my life in general. I am always putting on a face to cover my own messes. And, I know I am not the only woman to do this. So, if all the woman I am comparing my broken insides to are doing the same thing I do, then what an unfair comparison! I mean, I know,  in my heart, that people's lives are never perfect, and there are always things going on behind closed doors, but in that moment of comparison that doesn't seem to matter, or hold a candle to their seemingly perfect outside.

This woman also was speaking of her own experiences of sharing the brokenness in her life with those around her. Just the thought of being so brutally honest, even with my closest friends, terrifies me. However, she made a very good point.

If we, as Christians. put on this fake perfect life we scare people away. We may think that we are showing non-Christians what a beautiful life God gives us for following Him, but we are in fact doing the opposite. We intimidate people by this 'perfect' life, and they feel inadequate next to us because all they are able to see is their own failure and brokenness.

Is this making sense?

Anyway, by sharing our imperfection (& I am not saying you have to share specifics, but just the overall struggles) we encourage people to see us as their peers and not as holier-then-thou. We encourage people to come forward, share their own brokenness and open their hearts. When someone opens their heart, that is where God does his best work. So, we need to allow God to use us and our imperfection and brokenness as an instrument to reach those around us. And, most importantly, reach them in the midst of their brokenness, not in their perfection.

So, we need to find the message within our own mess, and allow others to see our mess and see the message. Don't be afraid of letting things get a little messy...it is in those moments where we grow the most.

Here's to sharing our messes,

Emily xo